Today has been interesting to say the least.  I had a job interview at the university here, and I was so worked up emotionally about the interview I am completely exhausted tonight.  It's interesting, the position I applied for isnt that glamourous, but it's something I could be proud to do, and that counts for something.  But, it also brings up a bunch of other questions....

I had already started making a path in another career (with my grandmother nonetheless, which adds another layer of complication), and then all of a sudden, this opportunity comes along unexpected.  Well, not completely unexpected... I mean, I did apply for the job.  BUT, I applied MONTHS ago and I really kinda forgot about it.  So now I'm torn.  If I dont get the university job, then I dont have any big decisions to make.  But, if I do... I dont know what's going to happen.  I might be disinherited... haha... kidding... kinda.

So, this makes me think, and as a friend pointed out to me today-- I need to decide what I actually want to do with my life.  I have always known that I want to be a horse breeder-- hence the Ph.D. in the field, but I sometimes question that path as an actual "real job".  The next question then becomes, do I really need a "real job?"  Does that old saying "Do what you love and the money will follow" ever ring true?  What about my family?  How pissed with Grandma really be?

OK-- so let's sort some things out:
1) Current job and going to work with Grandma pays a very very small hill of beans, but has a greater earning potential.

2) University job pays good and offers benefits and retirement...

3) University job is SOMEWHAT related to my degree....

hhmmm...

Sure, that seems like a simple decision, and I admit seeing it in black and white makes things a little more cut and dry... but geez!